A Box of Oils

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If you follow me at all on Instagram or Facebook, then you know I spent the last week in Salt Lake City at a freaking oil convention. Who am I? 

As I write this, I’m still in Salt Lake City. Sitting at a table in the coolest coffee shop (it’s so cool that it doesn’t have wifi…) with girls from across the country. None of us knew one another before oils. All of us were living our lives, without the slightest idea that one another even existed. And then slowly, through different circumstances, and different seasons of life, we each purchased this box full of oils. One of us bought it to help with periods. Another bought it to help with sleep. Another bought their kit because of sick babies. And another bought it because of headaches. We all had different reasons for purchasing the kit, with no idea what would come of it. And honestly, none of us had any expectations for anything to come of it in the first place. We thought we’d buy the kit, maybe it would help, maybe it wouldn’t, and then we’d move on.

Oh, how we were wrong. 

Every one of us would never have imagined sitting at a coffee shop, with strangers we met from the internet, with this unspoken, intense connection… all because of that box of oils. Because of the circumstances that led us to the starter kit, we know have friends all over the country. New people have entered into our lives and our stories and have become a part of us. It’s crazy to think that ONE choice leads to so many other things. Things that have the potential to change your life.

It really is hard to put into words all of this. Like, I’m a words person. Y’all know this. But I can’t articulate accurately what oils have done for me. Entering into marriage and motherhood so quickly was a rough season. So much change in such a short period of time. I have lost a lot of myself along the way. And not because marriage or motherhood are bad… they’re the best things that have ever happened to me. But when you go from only dealing with yourself, your plans, your emotions, your life… to dealing with your husband’s life, his plans, his emotions, his life… and then two little humans… it can be a lot to adjust to. Somewhere along the way I have lost parts of myself that I never thought I’d lose.

Things like my confidence.
And my self-worth.
Things like my interests. 

My desires.
My hopes.
My dreams.

I’ve lost a lot of that in the process of all this change. I’ve been a peace-keeper most of my life. Wanting everyone to be happy and everyone to be content. And oftentimes at the expense of myself. And before you think I’m some martyr, you’re wrong. This isn’t a good thing. It’s not a good thing to put people SO FAR AHEAD OF YOURSELF that you lose yourself along the way. It’s not good to be so entirely unhealthy that you don’t even recognize yourself. It’s not good to be faking it and not even making it. Just getting through life is not what life is about. And that’s what I’ve been doing for so long. And I’m still there to some extent. 

However. Through a box of oils, things are beginning to change. Not only am I getting God’s creation on my body and in my blood and I’m feeling better and have more clarity and more confidence, but things are beginning to change even deeper. I’m beginning to find myself again. Through my business, through these friends, through the conversations, through the stretching and growing. So much is changing because that’s what happens when you use oils. Things change. Maybe your health changes first. And then your self-worth. And then your confidence. And your mindset. Maybe you stop needing so many prescriptions. Maybe your mind becomes clear. When those things happen, change is bound to come. You begin to be open again to other humans. You begin to trust and let down those walls. You begin to let others in and welcome their baggage. You begin to take off some of your baggage too. 

Slowly but surely, you start to recognize yourself again. You start to laugh the way you used to. You start to see good things instead of bad. You start to remember what made you happy and what made you… YOU. 

I’ve started to see myself again. I’ve got so much work to do and a long way to go, but I see light. I see it in the people at this table and I see it in the bottles of oils that line my shelves. I see the light in the faces of my girls and in the unconditional love of my husband. There is so much light that I haven’t seen in awhile, that’s been there all along, and I’m grateful to be seeing it again. And I have so many people and things to thank for this turn in my life… but it all goes back to that one choice to purchase a box of oils. One box of oils. With the power to change a life. 

Logan Hahn